TURNTSGIVING

HAPPY TURNTSGIVING EVERYONE!

Turntsgiving (n.) the day in Paris that coincidentally falls on the exact same American Holiday Thanksgiving, however, Turntsgiving is celebrated by two lone Americans who, to prepare for said Holiday, purchased matching sweatshirts and created their own make-shift Turntsgiving menu. The problem with Turntsgiving is that neither of the two had the day off to prepare a giant feast, and thus had to resort to instant mashed potatoes, chicken instead of turkey, and asparagus instead of stuffing or green been casserole or whatever else people eat on Thanksgiving. Ultimately, Turntsgiving shares all of the same emotional and gratitude-filled attributes as Thanksgiving, only to mask the sadness of being separated from family, food, and America the two lone Americans salvage their spirits by remaining "turnt" throughout the evening. see turnt.

Turnt (adj.) The most wonderful feeling in the world. Saught after by the biggest bousses and ballas, it can only be achieved when all 5 senses are stimulated to their fullest extent. The links between these senses cause the human brain to experience supernatural side effects, thus creating, the only way to reach maximum swag. Compliments of Urban Dictionary.

taken as the pre-Turntsgiving family photo
by Maya on Monday 11/25

Turnt Eats

Turntsgiving Snaps

even Ulghor was turnt

I don't care, I love it.

So, there was a girl that I went to college with. She graduated when I was a freshman. We were in a play together but no one remembers me. I also had the chicken pox during opening week so I was only in one show.

That being said, this girl (we'll call her StanJr.) also has a blog. Her posts are short and sweet and usually have a funny anecdote and very stream of [genius] consciousness/sarcasm. She's a great writer. So I thought I'd try to do a post in the same fashion: 

Last night, I was walking home through the streets of Paris after eating too much shit, after staying out until a little after midnight, and I couldn't help but remind myself of the "new start" I wanted as a 22-year-old. Sure, Paris is great and I should be proud of myself for the challenges I'm facing on a daily basis, but there's something tugging on me. I'm filled with self doubt, and I feel tired, and old. Even my face feels older. I hate looking at myself naked. Now I hope the bathroom steams up while I'm showering so I can't see the mirror. That's no way to be. Hannah once told me, "If your body were your friend it would hate you right now because you're talking so much shit about it."

And so, in misty weather that native Californians would call "soooo fucking cold…" I walked through the early morning, grey streets of Paris after my first run in months and I thought to myself, I don't care…I love it…
I love the feel of my feet hitting the ground, the slow steady breaths, the One Direction I guiltless jam to. I love the cold air turning my nose into a popsicle, wearing running shorts over leggings, and the fact that I fashioned a makeshift keychain so that I could strategically keep my house keys attached to the inside of my sports bra. I love the way people judge you because you aren't wearing ANY leather, the way my hair flips back and forth, and the way I hold my tiny hands inside my sweatshirt sleeves that are just too long. I love that I left the house. I love that I'm doing something. I love that I look like a lost 12-year-old wandering the streets of the 17th Arrondissment.

I listened to Icona Pop's iconic rebellious pounding the entire walk home. So, on repeat like three or four times…I'm feeling so empowered I might even check my phone that died last night after I asked a boy out but then when I plugged it in when I got home I was too nervous to see what he said even though the night was over that I left it charging facedown and still hadn't ACTUALLY checked to see what he'd said (he said he was busy) BUT I DON'T CARE I LOVE IT!

I mean, would you have gone out in this?

you're on a different road, I'm in the Milky Way

look at me, I'm walking in the street right now,
I don't care

you're so damn hard to please, we gotta kill the switch, you're from the 70s but I'm a 90s bitch…

(fun fact, that was actually a true to life lyric in regards to a gentleman I was seeing this time last year, isn't history fun?!)

Da Week-end

Dis weekend was cool.

Starting with Thursday day of the date: Maya and I went to the OFII office to talk about my immigration papers and why I haven't gotten my physical yet. THEY HAD THE WRONG ADDRESS THOSE IDIOTS! So, now I have to wait but at least that wasn't my fault because we sent in my papers my first week in France. Then we had the morning to kill so we went to Gallerie Lafayette and it was lovely. You know how the rest of my Thursday went.
See: "Laws of Attraction" post.

Friday I spent the afternoon with Jimmeth's girlfriend, Leigh. We walked around and went to Musée de l'Orangerie. It was AWESOME! 7euro and the Frida Kahlo exhibit. Now, I'll be honest with the world I'm not the BIGGEST fan of her work, but certainly her life, process, and subject matter absolutely stuns and inspires me. A few of my favorite paintings were the saddest ones she made in her final years from her hospital bed. They're gruesome but beautiful. She was a very sad woman but she really used her talents as therapy and I respect the hell out of that.

Friday night, I just spent the night at Hannah's and she cooked me food, and we had a good talk/therapy session as well. Dissecting inch, by inch, my pathway called LIFE. Then we fell asleep watching "Lie to Me" and "Made in Chelsea" two shows we both showed each other :)

Saturday! Hannah and I had a romantic dinner of couscous and vegetables. Supa delicious. Then Maya made her way over and the three of us dressed up and went to a club that played only 90s music. NOW, obviously, it wasn't all American music, but nonetheless we heard a decent amount of Britney and I found my new favorite song.

Sensualité

It was really fun to just dance until the early hours of the morning without an agenda, without looking for or at any dudes, and just with your girlies. The crazy's definitely came out too, as we took the night bus home. There was some man, who was drunk off his rocker making everyone on the bus really unhappy. It was 4:30 and we all just wanted to be in our beds and away from this drunk man. Then a woman got on. He was immediately intrigued by her, and as she declined his advances she also got the entire bus singing "Je Ne Regrette Rien" by Edith Piaf. It was MAGIC. Then we met some girls as we caught the very first 5:30am metro home who were really stoked that Maya and I were from LA.

"la chaaaaaaaanceee" they kept saying, and neither Maya nor myself understand WHY people get excited about LA when there are places like Paris, and Portland, and Prague and apparently all great cities really start with P. Or maybe we are just unappreciative LA bitches. Maybe because we're the only two who GOT OUT!

I digress, that was fun. Then we all came back, had some tea, and crashed…HARD. We all woke up at like noon Sunday and then Jimmy came over for a huge fiesta sized late afternoon, crèpe pajama lunch! It was lovely, and then Jimmy and I took off to watch American Football at a pub called "The Great Canadian"

Irony at it's best.

All in all a lovely weekend. I'm enjoying our four-some.

Gallerie Lafayette à Noël

A top the Lafayette with Maya

Hannah and my romantic dinner/dessert with Ulghor (and then Maya)

Laws of Attraction

Women Standards:

1. The leader of the pack
2. The provider
3. The emotional man
4. The protector of the family

Dani Standards:

1. Let's think each other is funny
2. Display an ounce of vulnerability (you are not god's gift to earth and it takes two to tango)
3. The inexplicable comfort/carefree vibes (we feel safe)
4. You gotta be someone I'd hang out with despite all attraction

Obviously, mine are better. 

"You mean, I'm someone you'd actually hang out with normally! Not just for my body?!" he leaned across the table toward me, smiling that smile that's so glamorous it's stupid.

And that pretty sums up all dinner conversation from last night. It was awesome. Dimitri and I had a pre-date dance party to happy French songs, and then I ate pizza with a handsome boy at a restaurant called "Del Papa" which is hilarious. We discussed the above topics among others. Hemingway, literature, Bukowski, Neruda, little things that happen during the week, trust, vulnerability, how humans are humans. 

The Boy asked me what the craziest thing that happened to me this week was (as he always does). I told him about the man Tuesday night who sang "Happy Birthday" to me in the metro because I got on with my party hat still on my head and how he hugged and kissed me to top off his cheery serenade. 

"No way," the boy responded, "Some old crazy lady sang to me on the metro on the way over here. I think she was seducing me."

Crazy shit like that is ALWAYS happening to this kid though. And he's a "Noticer" I've noticed. He just has this aura that MAKES people want to be near him. People want to be his friend, he's always meeting so many people because he's so open to all experiences and he makes everyone he comes into contact with feel important and like a unique spec of life on this planet. I've really admired that about him over these last few months. I think it's helped me notice more of these kinds of things around me. That and he's really sweet. I think he's going to make someone very happy one day. Well, I know he is. I'm just happy for the time we've spent together because I always walk away feeling like I've learned something more about life, and love, and myself. It's cool.

The most beautiful thing about staying the night with someone, isn't just the action, or the instant gratification, or even the holding each other after. No, the most beautiful thing is what happens in the morning. You lay there, warm in her sheets, drifting in and out of sleep as the dark sky begins to lighten with the first rays of the day. Finally, you realize it's time to go, but not before you observe the woman before you. She's tired. Her hair is a mess, no thanks to you. Her eyes are puffy from lack of sleep, and she's trying desperately to balance on one leg as she slides her free one into the jeans she'd left on the floor the night before. You watch her pull them up, and suck in her stomach as she fastens the button. She doesn't need to pretend with you, you've seen it. You admire her for waking up this early after the night you had. You dreaded the alarm almost as much as she did, and yet she rolled out of your arms, away from your charms and into her routine. And as you continue to lay there, watching the woman before you prepare for her day, whatever that may entail, you realize the most beautiful thing: we're all just people.

Mon Anniversaire Part Deux

Today was a typical Wednesday at home with the children. We played games, and I cleaned the SHIT out of Olympe's room. Pretty sure it was super magical. It also gave me a good reason to listen to music and kind of be in my own world. So, that's always appreciated.

One of the reasons that I love Wednesdays (in contrast to all the reasons I HATE THEM) is that Eléonore cooks lunch and it's always delicious. Today we had steak, which I always love. It's my favorite thing ever. I can't get enough.

After that I played an old favorite game "Fireboy and Watergirl" with Dimitri. Jeremy and I used to play all the time and I finally know how frustrated he probably got with me when I would die on accident and we'd have to start the level over entirely. Who knew that video games were a sure-way to practice patience.

Then I got sent to the gym with Dimitri for his "sports lessons." I'm not going to lie to the world, I definitely fantasize about his gym teacher. He's really handsome, has a lovely smile and he's good with kids. What more is there? I also received a dinner invitation via text from The Dude. So, we made plans to eat the next night. GREAT birthday weekend thus far. I did some intel for "good places to eat around me" Yes, we acknowledged it sounded sexual.

When I got back from the gym the table was set and dinner was ready. They had made me this traditional French dish that I can't remember the name of but I'll figure it out one day. It was like, pork, or rabbit or something wrapped in a sliver of bacon or ham or something. Olympe and Eléonore had made me a cake as well. Everything was just really nice. CHAMPAGNE (and kid champagne for us kids) it was really sweet they went all out. They even sang to me AGAIN!

And then I got my first parent-taken photo together with the kids. :)

all in all a very nice birthday with a
very nice family...

Mon Anniversaire!

So, here I am 22, the birthday wishes via Facebook were addicting as ever since everyone I love, and who really loves me are overseas. I heard from some people I wasn't expecting to, and even got some mildly more personal texts with birthday love.  My sister was the first person I talked to, Christina was a close second…and Barney didn't realize I was only 22. #classic!! <3

For me it felt like a normal day, I didn't have much going on. Woke up early to head downstairs for breakfast. 

When I entered the apartment Olympe was there to greet me at the door. 

"Don't come in! You stay there!" 

And then she shut the door to the laundry room in my face.

I stood there, confused, groggy, hardly feeling like this Tuesday was different than any other. 

Then she returned. 

"On y va!" she took my hand and led me to the dining room where there were sparklers and little candles propped in a tiny muffin, cake, thing…then the whole family sang to me while Olympe went and retrieve my cadeau. I was so surprised!! Especially since Eléonore had just recently bought me my dope ass Parisian boots.  So, that was lovely. 

She bought me a cool shirt and pink scarf from this posh French store NafNaf. I like them a lot. 

Later on in the day, Hannah and Tessa came over for luunnncchhhh. I spent like 20euro on a bunch of groceries and made tarts and like…guacamole…comfort food I don't know. We had good talks as always and drank TOO much coffee haha. 

It was a magical time. 

The rest of my night played out as follows. When I got off work I originally thought I'd be meeting some of my friends but alas, all of them were busy and had magically disappeared. SO, I ended up getting dinner with Damien, he's rooming with Lucie and is a really cool dude. He bought me a fancy sushi dinner and we talked about I dunno, stuff. It was really nice actually because I had been feeling so weird about the fact that I was attempting to celebrate my birthday with virtual strangers. They don't really know me that well or what I like, how could I possibly expect anything from them. However, Damien asked me what I usually do with my friends back home and I replied, "We usually just go out for sushi!"

It was like being home. Maya met up with us and brought party hats, and she bought me a birthday treat in my favorite little pub. It's got a tree in the middle of it, and it's hilarious. 

That's about it. It really turned around, and it's cool seeing who is really there for me and such. Pics!

birthday meal

birthday tarts
Mushrooms, tomato, goat cheese

that one time Hannah and I took that really awkward family
photo with the cat…whose birthday was it again? HANNAH?!

this is the crazy tree ha

This morning…when you see him…DIMITRI!

Joyeux anniversaire, 

joyeux anniversaire, 

joyeux anniversaire Danielle, 

joyeux anniversaire!

Day Before my 22nd Birthday

Well, I had a dream I was falling. I had on this weird device that allowed me to jump really, really high, but unfortunately, it had now way to counteract the falling back down to earth at high velocity part. Luckily, I was able to control the landing and ended up on a high rooftop with the Chinese Mafia who were stoked that my birthday was coming up and wanted to take me out! The dream ended with Chloé and me sitting on her bed, in a house that definitely is nothing like theirs, talking about how she sleeps upside down and that her brother is really good at selling drugs.

It was super weird.

After forcing myself awake, yes like Inception, I ventured into the apartment to tidy up and await the arrival of Hannah dearest. Mondays are our "sit around doing nothing, drinking coffee, and just shooting the shit" days. So, after her French class she came over and we sat around doing nothing, drinking, coffee and shooting the shit.

I digress.

She's really good at redirecting my thought in ways I hadn't really considered before. I've had a lot on my mind recently and she just really grounds me back in the present and helps me stop dwelling on the past. I find that she sees me for who I am right now regardless of the shit she does or doesn't know about me, and she genuinely wants me to be able to do that for myself.

SO

I suppose, the day before my birthday was a good time to realize this so that I can take the next year of my life (STARTING TOMORROW) and start fresh.

Today was a good day with the kids as well. Got them from school, came home, chilled, played games, took a bath (well, they did) and then Eléonore came home and asked if we could have my birthday dinner on Wednesday because she has to work late tomorrow night. She's lovely, and I really like this family. Also, we're not going to the Bahamas over winder break anymore, it's been postponed to Easter, but we ARE going to Barcelona and I think after that I'll buy my own ticket (or openly accept birthday donations) to London for New Years with HANNAH.

I don't want to sound clingy buttttt….she's a proper good time.

fait des beaux rêves 

My mom's birthday is tomorrow too,
so here is a photo of her when she was
une petite fille. She's the blonde girly
in the middle. Trop mignonne <3

This Time Last Year

So much has changed. I know we say that every year, but truly, it befuddles me how things do change. This time last year, I'm pretty sure I had pneumonia but still took all my finals, did well, performed in Dance Production (best time of my life) had amazing friends around me, had love knocking on my door, turned 21, went to my first strip club, the list goes on and on…

This year…
I've got new people surrounding me. People who've only known me a few months, or a few weeks even, celebrating my upcoming 22nd. I'm living with a family I didn't even know a year ago, I'm in Paris da fuq, did NOT see that one coming, I take public transportation again, and finally live in a place where I feel like myself. I mean, for the most part.
I mean, I guess I can do what I want.

But I guess that means, having no idea what I want.

Friday night we had a little birthday outing for yours truly. It was pretty cute. Some of my good friends here, and the nice French man from last weekend. He's very sweet. He dances so fun, we all went dancing later and he just has fun. It's pretty adorable. Saturday, I just hung out with Hannah and Tessa and we sat in a little pub watching two rugby games. England vs New Zealand and Wales vs Argentina. It was chill. It gets dark here so quickly, and it's gotten noticeably colder over the last week or two. It's nice bundling up and it's pretty sweet that I have these awesome boots now, because obviously they keep my shins warm haha.

I dunno, I think I'm just thinking about this stuff because I keep having these dreams that make me think I miss the things I've left behind. Sometimes it makes me miss people, situations, moments, things…it's not important and I don't dwell but I suppose in the last year so much has happened that I wanted to take a minute to just say thank you.

Thank you to everyone who's played a role, large or small, in my life. My 21st year on earth was romantic, exciting, challenging, terrifying, painful, and amongst the happiest of years I've had. So thank you. Thank you for the gifts. The laughs. The meals. The memories. The love. The love-making. The music. The car. The ice cream. The books. The drawings. The early morning phone calls. The texts. The adventures. The videos. The vines. The Laziest of Zippers. The dancing. The sports.

Literally, everything and everyone, my love will never go anywhere. My heart is yours. Thank you.

From Bunk Bed to Boots

Well, howdy there. Today I got me first bra!

I wanted to begin by thanking Lauren for the title of my stand up routine "From Bunk Bed to Boots." It is as confusing as it is alluring and I think when it comes to pass, I'll actually have a huge turn out.

I wanted to mention secondly, that I WILL eventually be going back and recounting the days that I've missed. Well, at least the exciting ones where game-changing life events occurred. Donc, it's imperative, dear readers, that you go back to previous dates to see the days less traveled because I will still be posting them in chronological order. LALALALALA…

So, shit has kind of popped off over here. What with the weather changing, the friends changing, and the ever shifting state of my host family I'd have to say that things are pretty. fucking. awesome. This past weekend was really great. It all started THURSDAY, when I noticed that my feet were wet through my boots. WHAT! I'm walking home from the kids' school, Eléonore is with us as well, and I'm fiddling with my boots. The sole of the right foot decided to F* all and just peel off so, that explained the wetness. When I looked up Eléonore was noticing me, noticing my boots.

"Again?! We'll get you new one's tomorrow after school."

And that's precisely what we did!

Friday after school, we met the children, took them to a few shops, and decided on a fancy shmancy pair of brown boots. THAT I LOVE. Eléonore said she'd pay for half, which was really nice of her. I always think of what my aunt, Tina, told me when I bought my first pair of Steve Madden lace ups, "You just gotta commit until they feel like you." Wise words, love. And since then I've transferred that advice into daily life as well.

Friday night was chill, hung out with some old people and some new people. Just bringing the cliques together I suppose. Saturday was extra chill as well. Lauren and I slept until like 2pm when Hannah called to tell me she was outside. YAY! We all drank coffee and sat around until Lauren suggested eating dinner at her place, and who am I to turn down free food? On y va! We went, we ate, we left!
Hannah and I came back, put our sexy pants on, got dolled up and met Maya at a small Irish pub near Mabillon to commence "The Crawl" a MeetUp group that takes you around to different bars. It's a really cool way to meet people, and see the city. That and there was a rugby match on so the town was pretty turnt. Hannah and Maya are also the chillest people in the world and Maya is extra fun to dance with mostly because she'll dance at any bar even when there's no dance floor. RESPECT.

We talked to some people but mostly just stuck together until the end of the night where we ended up at a small bar/discotheque and danced and danced. I ended up dancing with this rather tall, French gentleman who could actually lead pretty well. He had a cute smile and we ended up going outside and talking. He was in England for a little bit and picker up a LOT of English and has a LEGIT British accent, with a little twist of Australian. It's real cute. After the club closed, Hannah, Maya and myself tagged along with the Frenchman and his twin and other friend to a small pub/restaurant where we sat to avoid the rain and get to know each other better. It was genuinely a good time. He and I talked a lot about a ton of different things, and we just got on really well. Hannah and I got home around 5am after sprinting through the rain with The Twins.

Sunday, Hannah and I were USELESS except for making a crazy quiche with WAY too much crème fraîche. We watched "Lie To Me" all day and OBVI had tons of amazing conversation because it's hard not to when you're spending the weekend with someone who is so brilliant. :P
We went out to the 20e Arrondissement for a little birthday party for Johnson a friend of Peter's who I met through Taylor…I can't remember if I've addressed all these people, BUT I WILL! Peter and Johnson are awesome, and Hannah and I had a good time, relatively sick to our stomachs from all the crème fraîche but persisting despite our adversities.

This one guy told a HILARIOUS story which, I will re-tell.

I was talking to my friend's mother, who is French. My friend doesn't speak French at all and when she does she has a terrible accent, American. The other day we were all sitting around talking about things we needed to get done, and how hard it is to make yourself leave the house to go do them when my friend's mother said in her French accent, "Sometimes you just need to slap yourself in the dick and get shit done."

We think she might have confused the translation. But it was HILARIOUS. I dare you NOT to think that to yourself the next time you wake up in the morning and you REALLY don't want to get out of bed. It helps. When we got home we made couscous and mousaka, cause we're both extremely Greek, as well as some very English tea (well, made by Hannah). We stayed up for another two hours, snuggled up on the couch with our duvets and pillows watching "Lie To Me" because Hannah is addicted, and I've never said no to watching a series through for a second time. Except "Lost". Over it.

Monday was a holiday.
Hung out with Hannah.
Hannah left.
I cried.
I hung out with Maya.
We got ripped off at our breakfast.
3,50 euro water.
merde.
Then I chilled, cleaned, skyped Megan!!
Family got home, fed me.
Went to watch Rugby at the Lions: The usual Monday spot.
Received a cryptic text from the young gentleman and I am COMPLETELY at a loss on how to respond.
I ended the night with a petit rendez-vous avec the nice man from Saturday.
It was a good time.
He texted me when we parted ways to get on different Metros.
Fell asleep in my stupid bunk bed texting Lauren.
C'EST BON.

I'm happy :)

Today was pleasant as well.
The kids are great.
I cooked for the family.
I got dem compliments.
Now I shall fall asleep watching Supernatural and hope I don't have horrifying dreams.

Bonne Nuit tout le monde

P.S. I haven't taken my boots off since I got 'em.
And when I asked Eléonore last night if I could write her a check, she told me they were her gift and that I just had to wear them all day, everyday, every night, shower in them, sleep in them, and never take them off.
she's funny. I love her.